Обо мне
Sex should be wild and primal and free. Fuck polite civility, let that animal in you out, show me the monsters inside of you, let's really feel ALIVE for a while. DMs here always open, kik is tantra_m0saica - DMs there always open too (: xoxo
Always always looking for the guy who can fuck me up like this ↓↓
You're choking me to the edge of blacking out, my throat is still sore from the feral pounding You gave it like 2 days ago, You've hit me so many times in the last 20 minutes that I can taste blood, You're just tearing up my insides, and im pretty sure i have at least 4 new cigarette burns on my body. yet somehow all i want to do is look up into Your eyes, smile, and caress your face. all i want to do is let You know, it's ok, You can let all that energy out, You don't have to hold back with me, the violent passion in Your heart and between Your thighs is unique and beautiful, how You are doesn't make you broken or evil, and even if it did, i would still serve You.
You are so much better than me - bigger, stronger, more active. all that power in You is so incredible, the fire in You is so foreign to me. i am nothing, empty inside, the only time i get to feel that fire is when You're filling me up with it. when i see that fire in You all i want is to have it inside of me, to have You fuck it into me. it hurts, it hurts a lot, and it's frightening to be on the receiving end of, but i can't live without it, there is no life inside me unless You're inside me. i lie here like a ragdoll because the power You have overwhelms me, i am so weak and passive and small and my body and mind can't stand up to the onslaught of You. i am in awe of You, i am terrified of You, i am constantly sore and broken because of You, but i need You, i am so lost and empty with You, and the way You treat me is what i deserve for being so useless and weak. You earn Your pleasure in bed, i have no idea how to do what You do. i earn nothing, all i know how to do is lie here and be used. i have no idea how to stand up for myself or assert myself, and i accepted a long time ago that my place is beneath someone like You.
what You do to my head is so crazy - my heart is pumping pure adrenaline, my body is in fight or flight mode, but my will just can't stand up to You. i can't even think straight enough to tell You to stop, im so drunk on Your power. what was it like to have my own needs? i can barely even think of myself as an individual separate from You anymore - Your pleasure is mine, Your needs are mine, Your happiness and joy are mine, Your pain is mine to take from You. i haven't climaxed in months now. ive almost forgotten what it's like to feel the need for it. there was never any question if You'd reciprocate - that's not how this works. and that's fine, it's natural between people like us, we both have our place and You've put me in mine. if i needed anything other than to be touched by that amazing passion inside You, id be with someone else.
You raise Your hand toward my face and i instinctively flinch, bracing to see stars again, secretly hoping it'll momentarily take my mind off the deep, stabbing pain in my gut. instead i feel You turn my face toward Yours before You push Your tongue into my mouth. i feel You aggressively bury Your full rock hard length inside me, followed by that beautiful rhythmic throbbing as You fill me up with Your warmth.
i know You don't get any other outlet for this violence inside You, and i see how much good it does for You to be free and wild for even just a while. i see the effect it has on You to have someone there for You who will always always comply and never ever ask for anything in return. i see how bad You need to have that kind of power over someone, and i see how crazy it makes You when You don't. i see all of it, but i don't understand it, much less why it feels so intensely rewarding to be the one to give it all to You. but I don't need to understand it, that's not what i was made for. when i see how much effort it takes You to be civil, to tone down that wild feral energy inside You for polite society, then i see how much more natural and free You are when we're alone and after You've finished with me...well, the math is easy: it's an hour of suffering for me, but it keeps that restlessness in You satisfied for hours when nothing else does.
but as you pull out of me...emptiness. it doesn't make sense, not 30 seconds ago all i wanted was for You to finish, to take Your hand from my neck so i could breathe again. now I'm reminded that You haven't just opened up this space in my body that's empty without You filling it - You've done the same thing to my mind. i don't know if ill ever come back from this; every time You fuck me, every little subtle show of dominance You display, it's like You're hollowing me out somehow, and filling the gaps with the unbelievable amount of LIFE in You. without You, im half alive, empty of purpose. You've made me an extension of Yourself, broken my will, replaced it with Your own, claimed me, and domesticated me. that's why I can no longer conceive of having needs of my own. i never thought id capitulate this completely to someone, but as i slip into one of Your massive shirts ("like a flag on conquered territory," as You're fond of saying) and stagger to the bathroom to clean up and fix my ruined makeup for the second time before noon, i feel like there's no other place in the world i could be better suited for. Im needed here, and i can do so much good for You, and i no longer care about the damage it does to me. Your joy, Your satisfaction, somehow ive ended up in a place where they're more important to me than my own...no, they ARE my own, because by now there's more of You inside me than there is me. and why would I want anything else?
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